100 words a day

So, I've joined this thing. And I would normally link to it, but can't, so here's last week's stuff.

1

When talking to people who aren’t your close friends or immediate family, we are usually rather careful about our manners. Not because we particularly like them, but, at least in my case, because we don’t. Of course, this translates into us being nicer to those we dislike, or are indifferent towards, than to those we do like. Which is rather a waste of time. But the people we love won’t care in the long run whether we’re polite, will probably suspect treachery if we are polite, while the outsiders will be offended if we aren’t. What absolute hypocrisy this is.

2

I need a break, which is, frankly, a strange thing to say right now, because I am, technically, lazing about and doing absolutely nothing constructive— term starts on Monday.

But my brain, never a restful place, is facing more turmoil than usual. Three worlds are colliding— one that I’m currently trying to swallow whole, one that’s been in there, in one incarnation or another, for the last four years, and one which I’m trying to get used to after a break of nearly five months.

And then there’s reality, which has never been more than a distant acquaintance of mine.

3

I am in a bad mood. Actually, the mood I’m in right now is what makes bad moods run and hide. Why? I don’t know. Am I now required to furnish a reason for a temper fit? No? Good. Because if you expect me to rationalize my homicidal rage, then you’re likely to end up as a homicide victim. And if you’re lucky, I won’t torture you first. Maybe I will, because, hello, homicidal maniac! This must be what ‘seeing red’ is like, except I can hardly see, I’m so angry. Just hope I’m left alone till I calm down.

4

Apparently 57% of all Indian men think they are smarter than women. This is probably nowhere near accurate, but it does point to a trend that should have died out by now. My dad and uncle and grandfather are the nicest and least gender-biased people ever, but it is depressing to think that at least half the male population (probably much, much more) still clings to the age-old belief of male superiority. It is extremely annoying. How can anyone say that they’re smarter because they have y-chromosomes and their mother / sister / wife doesn’t? It’s stupid. It’s also scary.

5

I have never been entirely comfortable with change. It’s hard, because even if the place you occupy after the change is comfortable, it’s not the place you were occupying before it occurred.

But it’s been a year and it’s beginning to sink in that this place is rather nicer than the one last occupied. If it lacks friends-so-close-they-live-in-your-head, it compensates quite adequately by supplying those who are unquestioningly accepting. A conspicuous lack of enemies is also rather nice. And the old place has changed too much for me to fit in any more.

I abhor change, but it’s good sometimes.

6

Class starts tomorrow, and, this, at least, is definitely going to be a good change. I’ve had nearly two months of vacation, and, while it was definitely welcome, given how nose-to-the-grindstone I was the last two months of term, after about a month, it began to get boring. The entirety of June went by in various levels of boredom.

So tomorrow is going to be great. The whole group will be there, for one thing. So will the newly-admitted juniors. And, sadly, so will the course that most of us are rather terrified of.

All the same, can’t hardly wait.

7

Today was bitter-sweet, nothing like the horrible watery coffee available on campus.

Ze loonybuns are back, yes, but these swarms of juniors have swamped the place and I’d grown used to knowing the faces, if not the names, of everyone in my department. They’ve taken over all our hang-outs, too. And our classroom, which, we are resolved, will be only temporary, because it’s our classroom.

But, ze loonybuns are back, and they are going to have lots of fun and sit in on each other’s classes when schedules don’t clash.

Oh, and study really hard. But that’s hardly the point.